I See Stars.

oh god, why was I wrong?

I missed all the meaning while it was spelled out all along.

To my bestie,

I love everything you hate about yourself. If I am ever too worried about you, keep in mind it's because there is only one of you, and I love you. Sometimes I feel so small compared to you. You are nothing but supportive of me, and you constantly have my back. I feel like I can't help you like you help me. Please teach me how to be a good friend, because it's what you deserve. You only deserve the best. Please always remember that. Never take less then what you deserve.

What happens when your friends and family become afraid of you? When the monster just takes hold and wont let go? Maybe there is no hope for me. I've fucked up too much. I mean, why does someone like me deserve to be happy and healthy. Why should I be able to have good relationships? The answer to those are I probably don't. But it happens any way.

My eyes opened wide today, and I realized "I'm alive." I have the power to turn my life around. All afternoon I sat in bed and felt sorry for myself. I let the monster take hold of me, I almost gave in. Then I rememberd all I had to live for. I'm trying, I'm really trying.

You and I can find an appreciation for life together. I promise it will be worth it in the end. I just kind of have a feeling.